A Sad Realization...I am Poo, and not Warm Poo Either.

I don't know what I am doing. That much is very clear. I just want some quiet piece of territory where I can make my own simple life. I don't ask for much. I just want simpler feelings. What is with all the complex problems? Why? I enjoy simple. Simple is fun. It doesn't have you flying all over the place in a million different directions at once. It doesn't have self-destructive elements that force you to suck down the poison pill that's going to kill you.

I know I won't get my wish, and I also know that I probably don't want it to come true either. But that knowledge is no comfort to me. Ignorance is bliss. Bliss sucks of course. It's pretty boring. But right now, I could use a little simple and boring for a while. Just long enough to bring my life back into a harmonious balance, if only for a moment.

I dream of banality. It leaves me feeling stupid and warm in the morning. Right now that sounds like heaven compared to cold and fully cognizant of the pile of dung that is my life.